It's Never Too Late...

I did something for Marvel, NO ONE CAN TAKE THIS AWAY FROM ME! :P I wish I had saved time to beef stuff up with greyscale markers or something. When you see people like Jason Pearson, Chris Brunner, Eric Canete, Georges Jeanty, and more...you can't help but feel pretty inferior but I had fun and I think I'm learning to expect despite my failings as an artist people find my art to be fun and I'm gonna take that too the bank. Enjoy!

I should draw more.

So this has been in talks forever, everyone loved WindUp but managing the site became too much work, but in the days of flickr and blogger we can do it with next to no effort. Dave has volunteered/was conned into taking the admin role in place of Rob and I and we're bringing it back! If you don't know what WindUp was, WindUp was an art project I set up with some friends to keep us all drawing while too many of us we're waiting tables or some comparable bullshit. We'd just pick a character and draw it. No deadlines. No prizes. You could do multiple entries. If you didn't like a character one month you could revisit an old one. A couple times we tried to tie them into something else. A lot of these kinds of web projects are around, Project Rooftop, with slight differences. This was ours though and we're bringing it out. It's fun and ends up with some great friendly competition. Almost ALL of my WindUp projects became portfolio mainstays and the reactions are always amazing when folks see something they love, done a little differently. If your interested email the admin.

Our first new project is Brock Samson, above is some details.

Let's get it on!

I was feeling nostalgic and was reading my old blog posts and I saw me being vague and overdramatic about my life. I lack of honesty in regards to my feelings is part of my depression. Yes, I have depression. But, it doesn't make me a bad person and I find if folks can help I grow beyond it. I have to let go of the belief that my emotions don't matter or that people don't care about them. Or worse I feel like...everything I see others do in selfishness is fine when they do it for some reason or another but wrong when I do it. Living requires a personal barometer, you can't be putting yourself in constant judgement and when i don't life gets better.

My mom has been suffering with brain cancer for 3+ years. The last year has included an emphasis on the suffering, I want to be honest about it here. For friends who I can't always keep in touch with and theoretically fans I don't know. It's been awful. This last year in particular and I didn't openly say it until recently. All I said was cliches and awknowledgements of great things, as if I'm a spoiled brat for being angry about this incredible mental strain cause others have it worse or because i still have good fortune. But finding a cookie on a battle field doesn't make that shit candyland. I had a hard year and it's not changing so, there it is true believers. This year sucks, on to the next episode.

Becky and I loved and respected each other as friends. We're even attracted to each other. I'll never understand why it couldn't work, it just always struggled. Born under a bad sign? Maybe. I guess i'm glad she's surrounded by friendships she made for herself. With a foundation like that, you know she's doing ok. For me I guess, I think after this year...i'll rethink everything. I'm not waiting a year because i'm procrastinating, it's just with therapy, the studio, and the house. Some stuff is awesome...i'm just too embroiled in the challanges of my life. It's been a relentlessly hard year and learning to admit that and not feel guilty makes a huge difference.

Claud says it should be me time for awhile, she's probably right. Claud's pretty fuckin' awesome, we make a dynamic duo.... working on some cool work right now...wish i had someone to share it with.

I'm working on finding optimism, but there is a haze of anger.

Mail.Appetizer is one of the best, subversive, Apple mail-add ons, period. It's got a new Beta available for Leopard and I'm so psyched to have it back. Got a mac, download it.

Just to show the kind of tenacity making you own comic requires, Joseph contacted me to do covers for Lazarus in 2004, we had delays on both sides but I wrapped them up in 2005 so this project to me, seems like a millenia ago. But this has been Joseph's baby and he's stayed dedicated and has a commited interior artist (Alex Lugo) So he's gotta a publisher so, buy ten copies. It's fun to see them colored. Oh here are some related links:

Markosia the Publisher's site
Lazarus:Immortal Coils
10 Worlds Studio Myspace page
Alex Lugo's site
Joseph's Blog

It's always a surprise when someone is actually sodomizing you and than leans and tells you they love you.